Friday, October 24, 2008

The Wall Street Journal turns into the Onion


Pint-Size Politicians Channel McCain, Obama in School Elections:'Change' Factors Big in Tykes' Talking Points; A Third-Grader's Economic Platform [Wall Street Journal]

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Sunday, October 19, 2008

Introducing You Got Yr Link Bomb - A new weekly feature at Tynan's Anger


So in case my minimal blogging of late wasn't enough of an indication, it seems I cannot get to blogging about everything I want to regularly. That's why every Sunday I will be posting new and noteworthy links that slipped through the cracks on Tynan's Anger, as per my tryout post on Wednesday. You Got Yr Link Bomb is meant as a cross between the Will Cordero Memorial Linkpunch and the Week in Review post of the Gawker Media blog of your choice. Hence: links featuring commentary with heavily regulated snark. These links did not get the full Tynan's Anger treatment, through no fault of their own.
  • Starting off, we get possibly the best Onion Sports article in weeks, maybe months. In my mind, it's the best Onion sports article since the now-legendary CC Sabathia-Prince Fielder Onion article. This one has it all: it satisfies the Cowboys haters, mocks Tony Romo exactly in a way he needs to be mocked, it's a laffer, and it's got its own consistent, ridiculous grammar and style. This one gets pwus one for being a vewy funny.
  • Much to my relief, Synechdote, New York not only doesn't suck, but it may be Charlie Kaufman's best movie yet. I've been excited for this movie when it was first announced over two years ago, and the delays have had me biting my nails. Now, with the exception of Doubt, there may be no movie I'm looking forward to more this Oscar season.
  • Roger Ebert negatively reviews a movie that he only watched for the first 8 minutes. He immediately follows the review with a brilliant explanation of why he felt justified in doing so. It was a totally ballsy move on his part, one a lesser critic could not get away with. But the fact that he was so responsible about his explanation is probably what made it work. As a side note, in the wake of Frank Rich admitting he ignores his comments, Ebert has gone out of his way to praise his surprisingly reasoned, intelligent commenters, who have earned accolades from Computer World. Come to think of it, this may inspire a separate blog post of its own. In other news, Arlene Croce's head just exploded.
  • Nobody likes the starfucker Ben Lyons. How we miss Roger Ebert's vocal chords. It's now a father-son competition to have the most unwatchable film review show on television. When those shows are on, I just usually pop in my Critic DVD.
  • Footage from the marathon Fucked Up concert is starting to appear online. Fucked Up's blog post makes it seem like they had no part in the current video, but I suspect otherwise. Sooner or later, we're going to be talking about Fucked Up as stealing the best band in the world title in indie circles from Yo La Tengo. And by "sooner or later", I mean "now," and by "we,' I mean "I."
  • In the first kinda douchey move by the otherwise genial Tim Westergren, Pandora lays off 20 employees right as the site begins making headway in its royalties battle. Is it just me, or are you already getting sick of employers using the vague term "economic realities" to justify layoffs? If it's a cost-cutting move, say it. If you're preparing for the future, say it. But "economic realities" means about as much as saying "good teams win games;" in fact, it probably means even less.
  • The Trib is winning kudos in many new media advocates' eyes. Just after endorsing their first Democratic Presidential candidate ever, the paper is now considering putting a halt on their AP wire service. Needless to say, Jeff Jarvis thinks this is the bee's knees. I could think of at least three things with the word "wire" in them than I'd prefer reading to AP articles: the script of episodes of The Wire, the DVD notes to The Wire, and the lyrics to songs by the band Wire. I would however, prefer reading AP articles to Advanced Placement exams.
  • Barack Hopey Obama raised what some analysts are deeming a asston of money in September. Imagine how many Main Sts. could be supported by the $150 million in Obama donations alone. If only a certain University of Chicago professor donated a fraction of that money to the school, we'd have an excuse to avoid these annoying protestors. Maybe. Probably not.
  • Finally, TERRY FREAKING TATE IS BACK!!!!

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Friday, October 03, 2008

A Million Little Pieces To Finally Be Adapted - As 70 Minute Blank Turquoise Screen

Believe it or not, that's not an Onion headline:
See, Nigel Tomm is an artist who likes to adapt literary properties in his own unique way -- by calling each a "remix" and adding one solid color that remains on screen for roughly 70 minutes or so. No sound, no dialogue, no narration, nothing. Previously, Tomm's done the same thing for Hamlet, The Catcher in the Rye and Waiting for Godot, among others. Here's a bit more description: "Nigel Tomm's film adaptation of James Frey's book "A Million Little Pieces" is the transfer of the story to the space of art. Somebody calls it absolute art. Somebody calls it abstract film. Somebody calls it fraud. To have your own opinion you must trust your eyes and experience for yourself the seductive turquoise screen."

And you can buy a piece of A Million Little Pieces for only $19.97 on Amazon.
To be fair, some would argue that a no dialogue adaptation of Waiting for Godot would actually be an improvement. That's something The Onion would cover.

[Cinematical]

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Sunday, August 03, 2008

Annals of meta-humor

Self-referential humor writing, making fun of McSweeney's and the plights of freelancing, and somehow working in a Yankees angle? It's like someone at The Onion has a John Malkovitch-style portal to my brain.

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Thursday, February 07, 2008

Onion Theater Humor

There are very few things that get my juices flowing more than mainstream humor outlets making jokes about theater (one of them being jokes about hockey, as well as combining the two with Tracy Letts). So when The Onion makes a joke about theater, in the words of a threadless shirt, "I'm totally blogging that."

I seriously want to know where they got the idea for an advice column with the stage directions from Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. More precisely, I want to know why I didn't get the idea first.

Enjoy, folks,

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